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Une fille comme moi
Je t'aime plus que hier, moins que demain ♥
Welcome to the blog of a 17yearoldgirl, where she posts her mindless musings and ramifications.
This is extremely private;
cos this is where she dreams, sleeps and cries.
She lives. 		"We can catch buses and count our change and cross the roads and talk real sentences.
but our innocence goes awfully deep,
and our discreditable secret is that we don’t know anything at all,
and our horrid inner secret is that
we don’t care that we don’t."
Ladeedumdeela and that's the way it goes
Thursday, March 19, 2009, 11:54 AM
I haven't been blogging for so long, I think I should revive my blog now. There were a lot of things going through my mind lately and I wanted to vent them out...and I did, by talking late into the night to someone. 

From last week since I saw Utt, I fell sick with a fever, skipped school on monday cos I wasn't feeling well, missed the math test I've been mugging so hard for, got to school on tuesday even though I still had one more day worth of MC, took chem and bio test, was one of the 5 people in my class that passed the chem test even though I only got a pathetic mark of 6/10, felt claustrophobic at home as though I couldn't breathe, was sick of the way my parents were handling things and felt like everything was going to crumble while I was coughing my insides out.

I hope I've made good use of my holidays. I think I ought to be proud of myself and my friends are all calling me a mugger now...How do I put it? I'm not smart, but I wanna go to Ivy League. With my brains, I better put in more effort than the average person in HC. But my parents seem to think likewise, esp my mum. Everytime that she opens her mouth, it's either to tell me to DON'T do something or DO something else to her liking. I hate the way that she thinks she's so superior and have the right to control me and meddle in my business just because she's my mum. WTH sometimes I really want her to just disappear and leave me alone to control my own time and just TRUST ME, trust that I know what I'm doing. Trust that I've put in effort and now need some time to slack. Sometimes I just wanna get the hell out of this house.

I'm just glad for the presence of my friends. If not for them, I would have no motivation for anything. I really truly want to hug every single one of them who made me feel better.

Maybe it's a dellusion on my own part...maybe you see me as just someone that you like to talk to and nothing more. What was it that made me say those things and boost my hopes up? Stupid girl.